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MEDICAL HUMOR/QUOTES..

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Author: seribulan       Show all posts   Read mode

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 Author| Post time 24-12-2018 06:38 PM | Show all posts

10. I dont find health-related puns funny anymore since I started suffering from an irony deficiency.

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 Author| Post time 27-12-2018 01:02 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
A British doctor says: "In Britain, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man's liver, put it in another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for a job."

The German doctor says: "That's nothing, in Germany we took part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for a job."

The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we took half a heart from a man, put it in another's chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for a job."

The Malaysian doctor laughs: "You are all behind us. Seven months ago, we took a man with no brain, no heart, and no liver and made him Minister of Finance.

Now, the whole country is looking for jobs!"

Share with your friends, don't laugh alone

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 Author| Post time 30-12-2018 04:50 PM | Show all posts
. The saying, Theres more pleasure in giving than in receiving, applies chiefly to advice and medicine.

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 Author| Post time 3-1-2019 09:43 AM | Show all posts
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 Author| Post time 3-1-2019 09:43 AM | Show all posts
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 Author| Post time 3-1-2019 09:44 AM | Show all posts
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Post time 3-1-2019 04:08 PM | Show all posts
Question: Does an apple a day keep the doctor away?
Answer: Only if you aim it well enough.

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 Author| Post time 3-1-2019 04:10 PM | Show all posts
Edited by seribulan at 3-1-2019 03:14 PM


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Post time 3-1-2019 04:16 PM | Show all posts
The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed.

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Post time 3-1-2019 04:18 PM | Show all posts
Catscan: Searching for kitty
Coma: A punctuation mark.
Hemorrhoid: A male from outer space
Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport

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 Author| Post time 3-1-2019 04:23 PM | Show all posts
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 Author| Post time 4-1-2019 10:22 AM | Show all posts

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Post time 8-1-2019 02:19 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
A doctor is given some papers to sign. He reaches into his pocket to get his pen and, to his surprise, pulls out a rectal thermometer instead. He exclaims, "Some asshole stole my pen!"

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Post time 8-1-2019 02:21 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts

"Mrs. Jones, I have some good news"

"It's MISS Jones Doctor"

"Oh...Miss Jones I have some bad news then"

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 Author| Post time 8-1-2019 12:15 PM | Show all posts
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 Author| Post time 12-1-2019 12:41 PM | Show all posts
Fwd-

KLINIK kat Bota kanan : 😁

Aje bebeno kome C Dilema Doktor Muda  

Seorang Doktor Muda yang baru selesai pengajian telah ditugaskan di Klinik Bota kanan. Hari pertama beliau bertugas, berlaku satu fenomena yang dia sendiri tidak tahu penyelesaiannya. Pesakit pertama ditemuinya telah mendatangkan fobia yang tidak berkesudahan. Sketsanya begini:

Doktor  : Pak Cik sakit apa?.

Ngah Lebo : Entah le Dokto. Darghi semalam badan awak ni dedo je! Libang libu dibuatnye!.

Doktor : Dedo? Libang libu? Pertama kali saya dengar sakit ni?.

Ngah Lebo : Itu le yang tak pahamnye. Dade ghase debuk debak je! Mate pun bepino-pino Bekelemayo!.

Doktor : Mengambil buku direktori perubatan sambil membeleknya dan mencari jenis penyakit mengikut senarai. Penyakit apa ni Pak Cik? Tiada langsung dalam senarai buku ni?.

Ngah Lebo : Taktau le nak cerghite macam mane ghedatnye Dokto Bile bangkit je ghase goyo! Jalan pun condong ghoyong Lepeh tu terghuih tejombab ateh lantei! Sebab itu deme dudukkan ateh besika tolak ni (Wheel Chair)!.

Doktor : Sambil menggaru kepala yang tak gatal. Doktor juga sudah pening lalat tak faham lalu doktor pun menyambung pertanyaan  Makan minum Pak Cik macam mana?.

Ngah Lebo : Makan? Nasik pun dikonyah ghase macam semba je! Kerghongkong udah sendat. Nogok ayo. Tawo lesyio!.

Doktor: ?????

(Siapa faham..aje comfirm orang Perak pior...😅)
.

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Post time 25-1-2019 01:43 PM | Show all posts
Sometimes your medicine bottle has on it, 'Shake well before using.' That is what God has to do with some of His people. He has to shake them well before they are ever usable.

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 Author| Post time 28-1-2019 11:41 AM | Show all posts
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 Author| Post time 8-3-2019 10:54 AM | Show all posts
Q: Why did the doctor tell the nurse to walk past the pill cupboard quietly?
A: So she wouldnt wake the sleeping pills.

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Post time 11-3-2019 08:32 PM | Show all posts
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