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Usik-usik spouse

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Post time 5-7-2019 11:40 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts |Read mode
Korang! Spouse korang suke ngusik tak? Sampai tahap nk nangis, nk hempuk dia or even pijak perut boroi dia tu? Urghhhh

Ok I have my fair share of spouse yg suke sgt mengusik. Rase nk pulang balik dia kat mak dia!

Contoh2 usikan dia:-

Kt pantai-

Dia: sy nak beli air ni

Me: ok, sy x nk

Dia: here ur air jagung.

Me: hurmmm tp sy x suke air jagung, sambil letak straw ke bibir while slowly sipping air jagung. The brain registered air jagung. But bam! It's taste like mango!

Me: awak, kenapa air ni rase mango, awak salah beli ke?

Dia: pandang muka sy dgn mischieve smile!!!!  

Dia mmg nak kenakan sy dan otak sy. My otak dh berfikir yg my whole body akn rase jagung. Tibe2 rase mango. Faham x perasaan tu? Pls tolong la faham

Second usikan:

Him: nescafe tarik tak de, ade nescafe o je.

Me: buat muka x layan. I know he will make sure Ade nescafe tarik. He loves me remember?

So he come back with nescafe tarik for me & teh o laici for him(y la suke minum air laici, u can get a can of laici n mkn laici sampai muntah).

Sy tengok dia sedut air dia. So secara reflex sy pun capai air sy, nescafe tarik yg agak panas juge. N sedut dgn straw! Then bila air sampai ke lidah, it's damn hot!!!!!

OMG kena lg, why in the world u put the straw dlm my air panas!!! Setan la. I hate u!!! Melepuh la lidah org!

Nanti sy sambung lg. Iove u with all ur perangai mcm Ali setan tu

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Post time 5-7-2019 08:24 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
my husband gurau yg mcm nak gigit or geletek kita.. n kita tendang or pukul dia kuat2 sampai lebam2 dia.. hmm.. penat nak lawan.. tp i will fight betul2 sbb x sula gila kene geletek... tp dia ok je if my reaction pukul or sepak dia.... pelikkan
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Post time 5-7-2019 08:36 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Dlm rtangga aku yg lebih suke mengusik aka membuli husband..  husband aku pendiam dan serius.. tmbhn aku muda 7 thn dr dia.. syok oo buli dia
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Post time 5-7-2019 08:55 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Halah halah halahhhhh maknora
Zaman pecintaan sangat dialog chuols tuh
Nak montahhhh acik baca

Hakikat sebenarnya...

Dia: you dahaga dak. Sat I pi beli ayaq teh ais kaw tang tu na. You tunggu sat tang ni

Sejam kendian (sejammmmmmmm)
Slurp slurp slurp baru dia sua kat kita

Acik: ayaq I mana

Laki gundu ku: laa tu yg you pegang tu

Acik: ni ayaq you! Abih dah tinggai ais saja

Heshe: laa share la. Bukan you suka pepak ais ka
Sambil berlalu pi terjun main ayaq pantai

Hahhhh!!!! Tu dia hakikat sebenerrr







Nota sampingan: sape nak beli dildo, kontek tt
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Post time 5-7-2019 09:13 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Kalau terlupa nama seseorang atau tempat dan tanya dia, my husband akan cadangkan berpuluh2 nama lain yang tiada kena mengena. Tapi bila ingatan aku dah pulih dan nama tu trigger, husband mesti buat2 tersentak, la baru je nak cakap tadi.

Skrip yang sama sejak 20+ tahun kawin. Lepas tu samada aku cekik dia sebab gerammm tapi dia dah ready cover leher dengan tangan, atau aku baring atas muka dia sampai dia buat bunyi tak dapat bernafas.

Yang ni pun action yang sama je dah bertahun2. Dah boleh agak tapi tetap tak jemu.  Kalau anak2 nampak kami gurau ganas macam ni, diaorang buat2 tak tau je.
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Post time 5-7-2019 09:29 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Kalau pergi mall husband akan cepat2 naik escalator dulu berdiri depan saya, pastu kentut then tanya ada bau tak? Memang cilakak pernah kat parking mall saya ngamok hempas semua plastic bag bawak barang ke lantai pastu dia pujuk g makan. Baru2 ni dia buat lagi kentut depan saya, saya terajang bontot dia. Tak pun saya akan cakap, "aku bgtau mummy (MIL) kau kentutkan aku"
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Post time 5-7-2019 10:44 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Acikgomen replied at 5-7-2019 08:55 PM
Halah halah halahhhhh maknora
Zaman pecintaan sangat dialog chuols tuh
Nak montahhhh acik bac ...

Dildo emas acik rozana ke? Kihkih
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Post time 5-7-2019 10:45 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
bondeh replied at 5-7-2019 09:29 PM
Kalau pergi mall husband akan cepat2 naik escalator dulu berdiri depan saya, pastu kentut then tanya ...

Kahkahkahkah. Ini lawak
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Post time 5-7-2019 10:45 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
bondeh replied at 5-7-2019 09:29 PM
Kalau pergi mall husband akan cepat2 naik escalator dulu berdiri depan saya, pastu kentut then tanya ...

Kahkahkahkah. Ini lawak
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 Author| Post time 5-7-2019 11:17 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Acikgomen replied at 5-7-2019 08:55 PM
Halah halah halahhhhh maknora
Zaman pecintaan sangat dialog chuols tuh
Nak montahhhh acik bac ...

Astaga acik ayat ko yg last tu!!!!!!!
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Post time 5-7-2019 11:25 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
noraidil_06 replied at 5-7-2019 11:17 PM
Astaga acik ayat ko yg last tu!!!!!!!

Kaler unicorn ade takkkk
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Post time 5-7-2019 11:28 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
makneng replied at 5-7-2019 10:44 PM
Dildo emas acik rozana ke? Kihkih

Habuan buat keychain
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Post time 6-7-2019 01:41 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Him: td beli tiket westlife.
Me: berapa keping?
Him: 2.
Me: woohooo!!
Him: piirah pastu jelir lidah tanda menipu.
Me: bongok

The end.

Aku selalu terkena dgn dia n suami selalu ckp aku ni naif. Jd aku fhm knp dia overprotective.
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 Author| Post time 6-7-2019 06:25 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Acikgomen replied at 5-7-2019 11:25 PM
Kaler unicorn ade takkkk

Bengong hahahhahaah. Mod potong credit dia
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 Author| Post time 6-7-2019 06:26 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Acikgomen replied at 5-7-2019 08:55 PM
Halah halah halahhhhh maknora
Zaman pecintaan sangat dialog chuols tuh
Nak montahhhh acik bac ...

Hello laki kau yg gundu, laki I herlok
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 Author| Post time 6-7-2019 10:24 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
sally03tomato replied at 5-7-2019 08:24 PM
my husband gurau yg mcm nak gigit or geletek kita.. n kita tendang or pukul dia kuat2 sampai lebam2  ...

Benci gile org geletek. Tp sy bkn pengeli. My other half pengeli. Tp x sampai hati nk usik.
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 Author| Post time 6-7-2019 10:24 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
aurorae replied at 5-7-2019 09:13 PM
Kalau terlupa nama seseorang atau tempat dan tanya dia, my husband akan cadangkan berpuluh2 nama lai ...

Hahahahhahaha comel sgt
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Post time 6-7-2019 03:55 PM | Show all posts
Banyak perkara yang aku fikir dan bakal aku eksperimenkan
kepada spouse aku. Ada diantaranya agak ekstrim seperti
sapu minyak angin pada bra beliau. Haha.
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 Author| Post time 6-7-2019 04:33 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Veneer replied at 6-7-2019 03:55 PM
Banyak perkara yang aku fikir dan bakal aku eksperimenkan
kepada spouse aku. Ada diantaranya agak e ...

Eeeeeeee.sian kt spouse awak.
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Post time 6-7-2019 05:09 PM | Show all posts
noraidil_06 replied at 6-7-2019 04:33 PM
Eeeeeeee.sian kt spouse awak.

Padanlah dengan muka dia. Siapa suruh mengada ngada sangat, geram
aku tengok.
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